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The thing that impressed me even more was the picture of a stable marriage as described by Dr. Gottman. It was quite different from the one we usually imagine or read in various marriage literature. Screaming matches and occasional bad sex happen, stresses Dr. Gottman, and it’s natural. You might think that that’s no big surprise, but these facts are generally overlooked in marriage tips, that usually concentrate on how to overcome those problems – smooth over arguments more quickly or better to avoid them, achieve great sex, etc. It’s not that I’d prefer bad sex to a good one, but we’re all human, and we all have our bad days. That alone will not cause a marriage to fail, and to my opinion, it’s important to legitimize those routine problems by pointing them out, so that some of us wouldn’t think they’re heading for divorce just because they occasionally fight with their spouse.

I myself am not married. Yet. But you don’t really have to be. It’s enough to be involved in a serious, long-term relationship (which luckily I am), to be familiar with the troubles that can arise. Once you start to think you beat the statistics, the problems start,  you realize that your marriage and love life are no longer what they used to be. So, what 2022-02-09 (水) 01:09:42  You may decide to start a new life. It’s more than OK if you do. If, however, you believe that your relationship with your partner deserves another try, this article is for you.

So here’s just a few basic tips.

JUST LET GO. You and your partner are two different people, often with different tastes and interests.  You should respect each other’s decisions and choices, whether in clothes, movies or career matters. Forcing your opinion on your partner won’t change him, but you’ll probably get into a fight.

SPACE. Everybody needs it from time to time. It’s OK for your husband to spend a weekend fishing with MALE friends. The best couple I know occasionally spends a separate vacation, and they adore each other. After 30 years of marriage, that’s definitely saying something.
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